A Geeky Guy's Guide to Untold: Chess Mates

I am a sucker for documentaries on Netflix. I really like the ones that are about non-violent crime, sports and just weird stuff. So Untold: Chess Mates is right up my alley.

This documentary is about a modern chess rivalry between a young, brash, loud and obnoxious named Hans Niemann, and an arrogant guy who happens to be the greatest chess player in the world today Magnus Carlsen.

If you think you haven't heard about this rivalry, I assure you that you are wrong EVERYONE has heard of this rivalry. Don't believe me? Well remember that story a few years ago about the guy who got accused of using anal beads connected to a remote "buzzer" to cheat at chess? Of course you do. See I told you that you knew about this story. Even the brilliant and hilarious show Always Sunny in Philadelphia did an episode poking fun of the scandal.

Yep. This documentary is about that controversy and the events leading up to it as well as the aftermath. As always, I won't give any spoilers but they do get into that part of the story quite a bit and you get to hear directly from both Niemann and Carlsen. A big part of the documentary investigates the scandal surrounding Hans Niemann's shock win over Magnus Carlsen at the 2022 Sinquefield Cup. It was so shocking that to this day, Carlsen refuses to believe Niemann did not cheat.

But there is much more to the story. Because I had only heard of the anal beads portion of this story... OK for the uninitiated I guess I should tell you what that is all about. You see, at these major chess championships, they actually frisk the players and use wands to make sure they are not carrying any electronic devices that could help them to cheat. well apparently there is an "adult toy" that can go inside a person. The device has a remote control that makes it vibrate. According to the legend, people thought Niemann had this device inside him while a person with a computer buzzed him when his hand hovered over the correct piece to move. You'll have to watch the documentary for more information.

So back to the rest of the story. Because I had only heard that a new up and coming player had been accused of cheating, I automatically thought this story would be about a scrappy underdog who tries to take down the arrogant Goliath of the chess world. Boy was I wrong. It turns out that the underdog was an insufferable douche-bag. He became famous for throwing tantrums when losing and trash talking and being incredible disrespectful and unsportsmanlike when winning. Some people like him for bringing excitement to the game. Cool. To each their own. But to me he was/is just an asshole.

Wow. So would this be a movie where I end up rooting for the Goliath to crush the classless newbie? Nope. Because Magnus Carlsen is quite unlikable as well. I have never been the absolute best in the world at anything. I will never be the best in the world at anything, so it is hard for me to know the impact that being objectively the greatest at something has on ones psyche and demeanor. Based on how Carlsen comes across, at least for him, it made him nearly as insufferable as Niemann.

So I really had no one to root for in this story. But that is OK. It is the story that is the star, not either of the players. I still found it completely fascinating and extremely well made. The Untold series has never let me down.

So what do you all think? Any chess fans out there? Anybody like either of these guys?

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