The mother-in-law I hope to become #Loh284

Hello guys, here's my thoughts loud:

For someone joining another family, he or she is already nervous, whether they will be loved, accepted, and welcomed. I see no reason for their life to become difficult because they got married. I'm not yet a mother-in-law, but from watching my mother's relationship with my partner and the praises I often hear from him and some of his family commend her for being so open to loving, understanding, accommodating and correcting in love. I would like to be an enlightened kind of mother-in-law just like my mother is. My spouse keeps praising my mum for loving and accepting him for who he is. For me, I want to do better as a mother-in-law rather than "say she's not my child, she's not family because she doesn't have our blood, as such shouldn't be respected". My own experience has made me want to do better as a mother-in-law in the future because, no matter how much effort you put in making a nice meal, it wasn't good enough. No need for comparison and harsh criticism. I will understand that my role is different. I can't be the mother and wife at the same time. I will not try to undermine her contributions and presence, so I feel better as an elder. I will support her decisions and assist her to do well for herself instead of making jest and passive remarks. I will respect and enforce healthy boundaries once I am in their home; I will not have to bash unnecessarily into their private room except invited. I have seen people bash in during private moments simply because they are family. Family members ought to respect personal space. Family shouldn't be only in number but in their availability and thoughtfulness. I will also be willing to learn from her and acknowledge her preference; everyone has a style for doing their stuff. Yes, I had learned how to make some nice dishes from my mother-in-law because we never made them in my own family. She told me that her son loved it. It was a great bonding period for me until I got it right. I hope to help make her pregnancy and postpartum experience worthwhile by assisting with babycare, cooking special meals, and making her comfortable. I hope not to be the reason my daughter in-laws experiences marital conflicts, I already have two boys. I look forward to being in good spirits with my daughter-in-law and grandchildren engaging in hangouts and shopping together. I long to be a prayerful, thoughtful, and resourceful mother-in-law. I would like to be present in my grandchildren's life too. I believe if you love your son in-law or daughter-in-law, they find it easy and safe to drop their kids at your place. I will like that to experience that confident trust. I want peace to grow and be sustained in my family's future. I hope to be a genuinely loving mother in-law - loving the person for who they are and not conditional love based on what they can offer or give.